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Sojourn #4
Category: /General/
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If I could take you to a placeAnd let you see and feel
How wonderful it could be
Would you agree to follow me?
2
There was a man born into the world complete
And let himself be conditioned by irrational beliefs
That have only deepened illusion
And soon his heart was in tethers
Mind filled with muck
Soul empty
A listless specter
And the prognosticators were clapping with delight.
But in the dawn of a new spring
The king of kings arrived
An epiphany surmised
And he promised a world of light
If the man just believed
Slowly, he healed
And began to help others in need
Can miracles happen?
Surely as the past morphing into the present
Promising a better future.
3
This ain’t a song of redemption
It’s about being reborn
Focused without distraction
Confident in the midst of self-doubt
The realest smile
That replaces the passive aggressive frown
Independent
The wheel isn’t so much reinvented
As it is clarified.
So, open the door
For those who love, care and have your back
Not to clever con men
Who deliver nothing but fake news
Wrapped in colorful attention seeking paper.
4
It’s always knocking
Yet you always open the door
No matter the filth, disease
The sadistic tidings brought
You’ll just rationalize
You’re caught in the vice
And might as well
Stay enveloped with the madness
Until he turns out the light
Good riddance
Good night.
5
Don’t give up
No matter who or what
Is trying to bring you down
Break your spirit.
When there is hunger
Appears the fullness of love
For where there is hatred
Soon will become peace
For you must believe in yourself
Ain’t no human power gonna get you through consistently
Look to the sky
He’s beside you
Thy will not mine be done.
Don’t give up
Trying to mend and heal
Precious time left on earth
To obsess over resentments
That will never find resolution
If you’re bent on seeking revenge.
You might be called a hypocrite
You may silence the inner voice with distractions
But its ills keep hounding you
Just keep moving forward
One step at a time up the mountain
Without the past being strapped to your back
Cause whether you’re first or second best
Why does it matter?
In the end, it’s his call.
6
It took what felt like a lifetime
To feel comfortable
Not over thinking
Just revealing what’s inside of one’s heart
And not worrying how it will be judged.
If you need a nudge
To get on the right path
I’m here but won’t hold back
When you need to hear the truth
I’m not demanding any proof of your compassion
But you inaction as to move forward
For just being yourself is sorely lacking.
7
Out of bounds
Time to reel yourself back in
Surrounded by sin and indecision
There’s only one way out
And you ain’t going there
No matter how depression crushes you
For to be remembered for one act
Instead of what you accomplished
Is a cold slap in the face
Of an eternal morning.
Resist the darkness
And the fool’s folly of material wealth
At the expense of others back breaking toil
For the soil is moist
Ripe for planting
But you must take care of the crop
And be aware of those who want to poison your bounty.
8
I’m emotionally dead
And don’t know it
That’s what they say anyway
Led along by heart upon sleeve
Always believing
Ever internalizing
It’s amazing one remembers the negative
While spending the rest of our days
Trying to accentuate the positive.
Squash your dreams
Change your dress
Don’t forget to confess
While carrying guilt and shame
They gave you the nails
You supplied the hammer
Despite what they portend
You have a right to be happy
And life your life as you see fit
Meanwhile, jealous and envious people
Are trying to hold you back
Surprise, you’re one of them.
9
If it took an act of God
To get through to you
Would you accept it?
Or would you deem it insufficient
Or questioning his motives?
Yet trust yourself
To navigate through the perfidious waters.
There isn’t a shred of doubt left
That you need a helping hand
The plans have gone awry
Your toxicity is suffocating
All the good vibes around you
It ain’t fair to you
Certainty not for them
So, what are you gonna do about it?
10
The anger and frustration
Gets me absolutely nowhere
Here comes the generalizations
Based on a few tragic moments
For there have been times
When I’ve felt ashamed
Somehow I wasn’t good enough.
So, I’m giving up on trying
To please
Reassure you
If you can’t accept
Or dare to critically think
Then what’s there left to do?
I’d rather risk being alienated
Or labeled weird
For there's a price to be paid
To achieve enlightenment.
11
Discombobulated
Tangled up
Emotions inside
Bottled up
Unwilling
Unable to reach the surface
Fear of being called weak
A sniveling fool
Once strength was an asset
Not it’s looked upon
As being out of touch
Emotionless
Stoic
So I’m in combat with my archenemy
Myself
Oh, I can be so dramatic.
I’m not going to be someone else
That I’ll never respect
But there I go again
Comparing
Instead of sharing my heart
I’ll compromise
Never settle
If I’m attacked
Either take it or fight back
Because no human power is gonna run to the rescue
The worst kind of toxicity
To internalize every criticism
Believe it to be so
Not a coincidence
To remember every slight
But have the hardest time
Trying to remember a positive validation
Of unconditional love.
12
Perhaps, there will always be those
That live on assumptions
Comfortable in the bubble
Allowing only like minded
To participate in the conversation
Terrified of the uncomfortable
Discourse that may teach
Inspire
And if it’s a crime
To think beyond the obvious
Then charge me fully
For I’d rather be alone
Than be tolerated.
13
Halfhearted measures avail nothing
For a heart of stone
Will never achieve intimacy
Purity
Sanctity of blessings
That you can wish for
But never embrace
For you prefer the easy way.
Building up walls
Instead of tearing them down
You could be a hero
In the wretchedness of villainy
Or be a sheep that believe
They are above it all
But just another zombie
Led by the masses
To a certain spiritual death.
14
As a man thinketh
So he feels
Believes and achieves
And either gets what
He truly needs
Or suffers from the chaos
Born from his ignorant beliefs.
I had to get out of the way
And hand the wheel
To someone far more capable
To lead me to the destination
I’ve been yearning to arrive.
Forsake this foolish pride
For I’ve been taken for a hellish ride
I’ve forgiven all the trespasses
But I must change my ways
No more blame to be cast
On the exterior
While the interior has been neglected
As the beautiful garden quickly became
A modicum of weeds
Now is the moment
To make it wonderful again
Purity of heart
Clarity of mind
Soundness of soul.
15
Lovely day to be alive
After a epoch of failed expectations
Endless obstruction
But I’m trying to move on past that now
Time is painfully short
No longer going to spin my wheels
In irrelevancy and cynical retorts.
Who ever said that redemption couldn’t occur?
Was it some jealous fool?
Who had the tools but failed to make the effort?
Or was it you?
That didn’t believe was worthy?
Not a surprise when nothing gets accomplished
Beauty turns to rust
The victim combusts
And there’s a story to sell.
I’m not interested in the epilogue
I’m still in the present
With an ear bent towards the past
And a prophetic view of the future
As I shed my skin
Reborn.
16
Keep him in your heart
Though the mind may be confused
Praying for clarity
Just remember there is a dawn
After the darkness is extinguished.
A peace forthcoming
Don’t let others tell you how shall grieve
Just believe his soul will find rest
And know that you will see him again
A reunion of joy
The tears have always been real
Let them heal
Never shut down
And be cursed with a heart of stone
For you will never truly feel the fullness
The holiness of God.
You’re allowed to take as much time
As you need
I pray that I will be present
When you desire an embrace
In a place of superficial musings
And narcissistic amblings across
The shakiest of foundations
Let him be your bridge
Your strength
Redeemer
Don’t ever lose faith in salvation.
17
I’m sick of being ill
Tired of the resentments
Pain
That infects my soul
Hardens the heart
For I desire freedom
Serenity
Not to be a tool
Just to further division
On a living corpse
For others to revel in
Vulturous necrophilia.
I’m not only trying to be in touch with humanity
But in his will too
Only a fool would continue
Spouting bitterness and hate
While believing that he is worthy of blessings
Of a saint like underdog
I’m trying to move ahead
Understand that I’m not going back
To that awful place
Unhappy
Out to lunch
If you desire such a wretchedness place
That’s your prerogative
But I warn you
Entry is free
But to leave is a costly expense
It will take a lot more
Than man alone
New age illusion
Claptrap and conspiracy theories
To truly experience a spiritual awakening.
18
If happiness is a paradise
That no man can achieve
Why make the effort then?
I don’t want to be a slave to the past
Just because you’re miserable
That I’m destined to live your sad fate.
Emotional poison inside my heart
Slowly being excised
It’s not one and done
Discipline
Toil
No longer interested
In being a foe or foil.
I yearn to be a friend
Mentor
Lover
Have lived in the cellar of
Discontent like Rasputin
And I’m exhausted
Waving the white flag
I can’t fight anymore
A losing battle in the war
With myself.
If you want to go back
To the innocence of childhood
Alive
Not rigid
Warmth
Not frigid
It can be accomplished
This time around
You’ll have the wisdom in your arsenal
But that doesn’t mean
You can do whatever without reprisal
There must be a foundation
Call it spiritual
Deem it ethical
But be a warrior with a conscience
Not a rebel just to feed your ego
Never people please
Out of a knee jerk reaction to fear
It’s not black or white
The fullness of God within your sight
Don’t worry about being criticized
That you’re uncool or boring
You wanna live
Thrive and say goodbye
To that old self
That was inadequate
And lost his way trying to
Make everyone happy
Instead of loving yourself
It’s beyond psychoanalytical
Within the heart
That’s been closed down
Announcement has been made
A grand opening in store
Isn’t it wonderful?
The bells are ringing
Birds are singing
Hopeful discourse
Excitement in your voice
Spring in step
Some did the best they could
And you can’t go on being resentful
For their deeds
You weren’t perfect either
The water is under the bridge
Stillness ever floweth
Where it leads is up to you.
P-6/18 and 7/18.
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