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Sojourn #4

Category: /General/

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If I could take you to a place

And let you see and feel

How wonderful it could be

Would you agree to follow me?


2

There was a man born into the world complete

And let himself be conditioned by irrational beliefs

That have only deepened illusion

And soon his heart was in tethers

Mind filled with muck

Soul empty

A listless specter

And the prognosticators were clapping with delight.


But in the dawn of a new spring

The king of kings arrived

An epiphany surmised

And he promised a world of light

If the man just believed

Slowly, he healed

And began to help others in need

Can miracles happen?

Surely as the past morphing into the present

Promising a better future.


3

This ain’t a song of redemption

It’s about being reborn

Focused without distraction

Confident in the midst of self-doubt

The realest smile

That replaces the passive aggressive frown

Independent

The wheel isn’t so much reinvented

As it is clarified.


So, open the door

For those who love, care and have your back

Not to clever con men

Who deliver nothing but fake news

Wrapped in colorful attention seeking paper.


4

It’s always knocking

Yet you always open the door

No matter the filth, disease

The sadistic tidings brought

You’ll just rationalize

You’re caught in the vice

And might as well

Stay enveloped with the madness

Until he turns out the light

Good riddance

Good night.


5

Don’t give up

No matter who or what

Is trying to bring you down

Break your spirit.


When there is hunger

Appears the fullness of love

For where there is hatred

Soon will become peace

For you must believe in yourself

Ain’t no human power gonna get you through consistently

Look to the sky

He’s beside you

Thy will not mine be done.


Don’t give up

Trying to mend and heal

Precious time left on earth

To obsess over resentments

That will never find resolution

If you’re bent on seeking revenge.


You might be called a hypocrite

You may silence the inner voice with distractions

But its ills keep hounding you

Just keep moving forward

One step at a time up the mountain

Without the past being strapped to your back

Cause whether you’re first or second best

Why does it matter?

In the end, it’s his call.


6

It took what felt like a lifetime

To feel comfortable

Not over thinking

Just revealing what’s inside of one’s heart

And not worrying how it will be judged.


If you need a nudge

To get on the right path

I’m here but won’t hold back

When you need to hear the truth

I’m not demanding any proof of your compassion

But you inaction as to move forward

For just being yourself is sorely lacking.


7

Out of bounds

Time to reel yourself back in

Surrounded by sin and indecision

There’s only one way out

And you ain’t going there

No matter how depression crushes you

For to be remembered for one act

Instead of what you accomplished

Is a cold slap in the face

Of an eternal morning.


Resist the darkness

And the fool’s folly of material wealth

At the expense of others back breaking toil

For the soil is moist

Ripe for planting

But you must take care of the crop

And be aware of those who want to poison your bounty.


8

I’m emotionally dead

And don’t know it

That’s what they say anyway

Led along by heart upon sleeve

Always believing

Ever internalizing

It’s amazing one remembers the negative

While spending the rest of our days

Trying to accentuate the positive.


Squash your dreams

Change your dress

Don’t forget to confess

While carrying guilt and shame

They gave you the nails

You supplied the hammer

Despite what they portend

You have a right to be happy

And life your life as you see fit

Meanwhile, jealous and envious people

Are trying to hold you back

Surprise, you’re one of them.

9

If it took an act of God

To get through to you

Would you accept it?

Or would you deem it insufficient

Or questioning his motives?

Yet trust yourself

To navigate through the perfidious waters.


There isn’t a shred of doubt left

That you need a helping hand

The plans have gone awry

Your toxicity is suffocating

All the good vibes around you

It ain’t fair to you

Certainty not for them

So, what are you gonna do about it?


10

The anger and frustration

Gets me absolutely nowhere

Here comes the generalizations

Based on a few tragic moments

For there have been times

When I’ve felt ashamed

Somehow I wasn’t good enough.


So, I’m giving up on trying

To please

Reassure you

If you can’t accept

Or dare to critically think

Then what’s there left to do?

I’d rather risk being alienated

Or labeled weird

For there's a price to be paid

To achieve enlightenment.


11

Discombobulated

Tangled up

Emotions inside

Bottled up

Unwilling

Unable to reach the surface

Fear of being called weak

A sniveling fool

Once strength was an asset

Not it’s looked upon

As being out of touch

Emotionless

Stoic

So I’m in combat with my archenemy

Myself

Oh, I can be so dramatic.


I’m not going to be someone else

That I’ll never respect

But there I go again

Comparing

Instead of sharing my heart

I’ll compromise

Never settle

If I’m attacked

Either take it or fight back

Because no human power is gonna run to the rescue

The worst kind of toxicity

To internalize every criticism

Believe it to be so

Not a coincidence

To remember every slight

But have the hardest time

Trying to remember a positive validation

Of unconditional love.


12

Perhaps, there will always be those

That live on assumptions

Comfortable in the bubble

Allowing only like minded

To participate in the conversation

Terrified of the uncomfortable

Discourse that may teach

Inspire

And if it’s a crime

To think beyond the obvious

Then charge me fully

For I’d rather be alone

Than be tolerated.


13

Halfhearted measures avail nothing

For a heart of stone

Will never achieve intimacy

Purity

Sanctity of blessings

That you can wish for

But never embrace

For you prefer the easy way.


Building up walls

Instead of tearing them down

You could be a hero

In the wretchedness of villainy

Or be a sheep that believe

They are above it all

But just another zombie

Led by the masses

To a certain spiritual death.


14

As a man thinketh

So he feels

Believes and achieves

And either gets what

He truly needs

Or suffers from the chaos

Born from his ignorant beliefs.


I had to get out of the way

And hand the wheel

To someone far more capable

To lead me to the destination

I’ve been yearning to arrive.


Forsake this foolish pride

For I’ve been taken for a hellish ride

I’ve forgiven all the trespasses

But I must change my ways

No more blame to be cast

On the exterior

While the interior has been neglected

As the beautiful garden quickly became

A modicum of weeds

Now is the moment

To make it wonderful again

Purity of heart

Clarity of mind

Soundness of soul.


15

Lovely day to be alive

After a epoch of failed expectations

Endless obstruction

But I’m trying to move on past that now

Time is painfully short

No longer going to spin my wheels

In irrelevancy and cynical retorts.

Who ever said that redemption couldn’t occur?

Was it some jealous fool?

Who had the tools but failed to make the effort?

Or was it you?

That didn’t believe was worthy?

Not a surprise when nothing gets accomplished

Beauty turns to rust

The victim combusts

And there’s a story to sell.


I’m not interested in the epilogue

I’m still in the present

With an ear bent towards the past

And a prophetic view of the future

As I shed my skin

Reborn.


16

Keep him in your heart

Though the mind may be confused

Praying for clarity

Just remember there is a dawn

After the darkness is extinguished.


A peace forthcoming

Don’t let others tell you how shall grieve

Just believe his soul will find rest

And know that you will see him again

A reunion of joy

The tears have always been real

Let them heal

Never shut down

And be cursed with a heart of stone

For you will never truly feel the fullness

The holiness of God.


You’re allowed to take as much time

As you need

I pray that I will be present

When you desire an embrace

In a place of superficial musings

And narcissistic amblings across

The shakiest of foundations

Let him be your bridge

Your strength

Redeemer

Don’t ever lose faith in salvation.


17

I’m sick of being ill

Tired of the resentments

Pain

That infects my soul

Hardens the heart

For I desire freedom

Serenity

Not to be a tool

Just to further division

On a living corpse

For others to revel in

Vulturous necrophilia.


I’m not only trying to be in touch with humanity

But in his will too

Only a fool would continue

Spouting bitterness and hate

While believing that he is worthy of blessings

Of a saint like underdog

I’m trying to move ahead

Understand that I’m not going back

To that awful place

Unhappy

Out to lunch

If you desire such a wretchedness place

That’s your prerogative

But I warn you

Entry is free

But to leave is a costly expense

It will take a lot more

Than man alone

New age illusion

Claptrap and conspiracy theories

To truly experience a spiritual awakening.


18

If happiness is a paradise

That no man can achieve

Why make the effort then?

I don’t want to be a slave to the past

Just because you’re miserable

That I’m destined to live your sad fate.


Emotional poison inside my heart

Slowly being excised

It’s not one and done

Discipline

Toil

No longer interested

In being a foe or foil.


I yearn to be a friend

Mentor

Lover

Have lived in the cellar of

Discontent like Rasputin

And I’m exhausted

Waving the white flag

I can’t fight anymore

A losing battle in the war

With myself.


If you want to go back

To the innocence of childhood

Alive

Not rigid

Warmth

Not frigid

It can be accomplished

This time around

You’ll have the wisdom in your arsenal

But that doesn’t mean

You can do whatever without reprisal

There must be a foundation

Call it spiritual

Deem it ethical

But be a warrior with a conscience

Not a rebel just to feed your ego

Never people please

Out of a knee jerk reaction to fear

It’s not black or white

The fullness of God within your sight

Don’t worry about being criticized

That you’re uncool or boring

You wanna live

Thrive and say goodbye

To that old self

That was inadequate

And lost his way trying to

Make everyone happy

Instead of loving yourself

It’s beyond psychoanalytical

Within the heart

That’s been closed down

Announcement has been made

A grand opening in store

Isn’t it wonderful?


The bells are ringing

Birds are singing

Hopeful discourse

Excitement in your voice

Spring in step

Some did the best they could

And you can’t go on being resentful

For their deeds

You weren’t perfect either

The water is under the bridge

Stillness ever floweth

Where it leads is up to you.


P-6/18 and 7/18.

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